March 31st, 2010
Where Are the Adults? Social Networking Suicides and Cyber-Bullying
Bullying has been around since the dawn of civilization, but in today’s constantly connected world, students are no longer able to leave it at school. A rash of bullying on social networking sites like Twitter, Facebook, and MySpace has pushed several teens over the edge. Perhaps the most troubling thing about it: teachers, friends, parents, and school officials knew about the bullying and allowed it push these kids to do the unthinkable. Dubbed “cyber-bullying”, this problem needs to be addressed immediately and with harsh consequences.
The Cyber-Bullying of Alexis Pilkington
Alexis was a 17-year-old from West Islip, NY. She was taunted online on a newer social networking site called formspring.me. This young woman was a successful high school soccer player who’d already landed herself a scholarship for her abilities. Her parents are downplaying the role that cyber-bullying had in her suicide, which brings me to my first point:
- This must be taken seriously. Many adults consider social networking sites to be more of a diversion, giving it the kind of weight that they might give to video game violence. The fact of the matter is, though, that these students grew up with these sites. Clearly, the teens who’ve taken their own lives felt strongly about their reputation on these sites. For them, it’s not a matter of simply deleting an account or ignoring emails. Whether or not you agree with how they felt doesn’t matter; anything that can affect someone like this must be taken seriously and dealt with immediately.
Perhaps more horrific than Alexis’ suicide is the fact that the taunting continues after her death. Photoshopped pictures of her with a noose around her neck have been posted to her profile page, and hate-filled messages continue to roll in. The police are monitoring her various pages, but unfortunately, being an evil sociopath isn’t considered criminal activity.
- Where are the parents? It’s true that kids today are more connected than ever before, with the ability to post from any computer, anywhere, but this doesn’t let parents off the hook. No parent wants to be despised for being overbearing, but come on, people, your little monsters are murderers. If you are a parent, check out your kid’s page now and again, read the comments and posts, check out the pictures. Letting your children run wild all over the Internet is like letting them loose in a Lord-of-the-Flies-meets-Clockwork-Orange pornography shop. Your job doesn’t stop when your kid logs on; it’s just getting started.
Phoebe Prince: Nine of Her Peers Are Facing Felony Charges
Phoebe’s family had recently moved from Ireland, which, as one of her fellow students states, was “probably one reason why they chose [her].” And just what was it that they chose her for? The list of felony charges faced by her cruel classmates includes statutory rape, harassment, stalking, and violation of civil rights with bodily injury. Local district attorney, Elizabeth D. Scheibel said that “The investigation revealed relentless activities directed toward Phoebe to make it impossible for her to stay at school,” and that the conduct of those charged, “far exceeded the limits of normal teenage relationship-related quarrels.” The real kicker? Ms. Scheibel noted that “The actions of these students were primarily conducted on school grounds during school hours and while school was in session.”
- Where are the responsible adults? Teachers usually have a pretty good idea of what’s going on at school. The gravity of the situation might now always be apparent, but it’s almost always clear that something is going on. If a teacher finds out that a student is being abused by an adult at home, they are obligated to report it. Why, then, didn’t the teachers involved in these cases feel at the very least morally obligated to put a stop to the bullying? If there’s ever been a good argument for homeschooling, this is it. When educators, the very people we trust to take care of our children while they’re at school, drop the ball like this, it’s offensive, horrific, and should be punishable by law.
After Phoebe’s death, another parent came forward, reporting a similar situation with his daughter and one of the girls being charged in Phoebe’s case, one that went on for three years and, thankfully, did not end in suicide. The school district is awarding the family $50,000 and has issued an apology that came with a promise for increased training, saying that “they should have handled it differently.” Talk about an understatement. That bully should have been expelled and sent to a juvenile detention center. It took the death of one of her victims to finally have something done, and frankly, that makes me sick.
These Are Not Isolated Cases
Jon Carmichael, 13, hanged himself because of bullying at school just last week. In 2007, Megan Meier, 13, hanged herself because a fake online boyfriend created by neighbors turned abusive; the whole thing was done by adults looking for revenge because Megan had stop being friends with their daughter. The list goes on.
In closing, I implore you to do what you can to stop this trend. Whether that means activating parental controls or talking to kids who seem depressed, you can make a difference and help stop this kind of thing from happening again. Our children rely on us; don’t let them down.
