hen in the course of an education did it becomes necessary for students to break the mold of the traditional classroom, a decent respect of the opinions of educators everywhere requires that said students should declare the causes which impel them to take their classrooms wherever they like.

hat whenever any educator becomes too restrictive, too traditional, or just too boring, it is the right of the students to take their classrooms with them into places more inspiring and with comfier chairs. The history of the traditional classroom is one of chalk dust, costly parking, and desks built without regard for the human condition, all contributing to an absolute tyranny over learning. To prove this, let these facts be submitted:

Traditional classrooms have doomed students to a world of dress codes, in which bath robes, fuzzy slippers, and grungy sweat pants have been wrongly outlawed.

They have forced students into unnatural class schedules, robbing them of the flexibility necessary for having a family, a career, and even a life outside of school.

They have kept students out of environments more conducive to learning, like coffee shops, kitchen tables, and, perhaps most importantly, under the covers.

They have imposed rules limiting the chewing of gum, making and throwing of paper airplanes, and texting in class, all of which are known creativity-boosters.

They have mandated attendance, even for days when the weather is too perfect to be inside or too nasty for anything but curling up with a good book and making tasty soups.

n every stage of these oppressions, we students have complained. We have warned them that, because of the tyranny of the traditional classroom, papers will be late, classes will be skipped, and in-class writings will be less creative. Our repeated petitions have been met with indifference. We must, therefore, hold the traditional classroom as an enemy and declare our separation.

e, the students of the 21st century, do solemnly publish and declare that the classroom should be anywhere and everywhere, that we should be allowed to learn whenever we choose and in whatever dress so suits the occasion. We are declaring our intent to revolutionize our classroom experience, to rebel from the stuffy lecture halls and archaic seating charts. We stand united as students and raise our voices (not our hands) in this union, saying –